Stick To One And Only One

Why is it so hard for you to stick to one thing and not to change it? Especially, when it comes to religion. Why on earth do you have to change? Do you think by changing your religion, you will change everything? You can turn everything to normal? Fuck no! Stop dreaming and start realizing what you did were all WRONG and it all came from your BRAIN. YOUR BRAIN not the religion that you had !

What makes you think that the religion you had did not help you? It is actually YOU did not let go your bad thoughts, your devil side of you when you pray ! The religion you're entering teach you to put away all those but the religion you had thought you too but you did not apply! You are applying it now with the new religion because you realized that what you did were wrong ! That is why you think that new religion is good. Open your eyes!!!!!!!! Open your mind!!! Make up your mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You dont have any rights to ask me to do anything or give you anything NOW and FOREVER !!!!!!!

Life After Death

I wonder what is the life after one's death.
What is it like?
What will you feel after your last beat?
What will you see after your last beat?
Where will you go?
How is your life going to be?
If you're being reborn, what will your life be?
Will you be able to be human again? Or animal or others?
Will you be able to see if anybody is crying for you?
Will anybody cry for you?
What will happen the second after you leave the world?

I really wish I could see what our life will be when we are dead.

To get ready, I guess?

It's too over to ask God to show me.

I shall keep wondering ?

Rude Words That I know That I Will Say

Shit !

Fuck !

Son of a bitch !

Bitch !

Damn !

Fuck off !

Fuck the dog !

Kan !

Kao beh !

Kanasai !

Diu !

Cao ni ma !

Ni ma de pi !

Wo cao !

Kan ni lao bu !

Ma hai !

Chi bai !

So hai !

Much better...

Return to Taiping

2nd day in Taiping, I still have nothing else to do other than playing piano, computer, eat, exercise, sleep. No activities! And, I am feeling sleepy and tired!

I am missing Melbourne now. I wish I am still there. But, too bad so sad, I can't.

Friends!! I'm gonna rot like how I used to rot before I leave to Melbourne!

Anyway, I have food to company me before I meet my friends :D FOOod~~~ HAHAH

Sometimes, not all things that I understand I can explain it out. Not even in situation. I just need to absorb everything and keep it in mind. No use asking me whether I understand it or not because I understand. I will say I don't understand if I said "What?" "Come again?"

Why are you always saying I am not doing the thing that I am doing? I mean I know what I am doing or thinking but why do you say I am not doing or thinking? Whatever I do seems like a different outcome to you.

I guess that I have to learn the way you live instead of the way I live? I can do one. Not all.

I may have no limits in putting you after my friends but you are definitely more important than them. Not in actions but in mind.

Fixing it really need a long time. I am trying but you couldn't see it. Cause, I have been doing the same bloody mistakes over and over and over again. God, help me! I really wish I can fix it, like NOW.

I WISH~

- to go to Jay Chou's concert in March in MALAYSIA

- to turn back time

- there is video that shows our past

- to punch a wall

- to sit in the bathroom under cold running shower for as long as I can

- I can solve the problems I am having now

- to sleep whole day like 24 hours without any second of eye-opening

- to run as far as I can, as fast as I can

- to cry

- to scream

- to know what people think and feel

- to go back

Questions from YOU

Why did you even bother asking me all those?

"So, he is your best friend. Then I am..?"

"Who is ...." (I'm not going to write it)

Why on earth you want to know? I bet you already know the answer so why did you even care to know? I am not going to bring back the past in our conversations. I just want our conversations to be NORMAL like normal old friends.