I can't take this any longer. The more I convince myself I'm not weak, the weaker I am. I wonder, how long more can I take this? I always tell others "Accept, forgive, and forget. Main thing is to accept, forgive, and let it go." I'm being hypocrite. I can't even let go and fly free. I'm still dragging it and I hate it.

I despise myself.
I'm disgusted by me.